Choose to Forgive

"Successful marriages and families are established and maintained on principles of... repentance and forgiveness." The Family: A Proclamation to the World

The video above is a talk given by Elder David A. Bednar of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles called "And Nothing Shall Offend Them." Granted this talk deals with any person in the world who offends you, not just close acquaintances or family members but it still applies very well to what I wished to address in my post today. Many people find this topic to be so very complicated but if you follow the simple words given by Jesus Christ you'll find it is so very simple. The topic today is on forgiveness, especially on forgiveness between family members.

When someone is offended they often hold a grudge and become filled with hate and anger toward the other party. This hatred if acted upon can hurt the offender but it mostly hurts the person who is filled with the poison of hatred and prevents them from accessing the powers of forgiving. It can destroy relationships, especially if the offense has happened within the family, and turns the once faithful, devoted disciple away and far from the gospel path. The funny and bitter thing about offense is that most often the person who did the offending doesn't even know they hurt someone. 

So instead of wasting so much time dwelling on an offense that wasn't intended and by a family member who you love, and are presently or wish to be bound with for all eternity, choose to not be offended. If you can't choose that path then choose to forgive and forgive wholeheartedly. To those who find the saying 'forgive and forget' completely wrong or idiotic I wish to remind them of when we seek forgiveness with our Savior. Does He not promise to wash away our sins and erase them from His memory when we truly repent? So too are we to do with those who hurt or offend us. We acknowledge the hurt, take the time needed to truly forgive and allow the process of repentance to sink in and be sure to forgive without condoning the offense at the same time (Successful Marriages and Families, 20-203).

8 My disciples, in days of old, sought occasion against one another and forgave not one another in their hearts; and for this evil they were afflicted and sorely chastened.
9 Wherefore, I say unto you, that ye ought to forgive one another; for he that forgiveth not his brother his trespasses standeth condemned before the Lord; for there remaineth in him the greater sin. 
10 I, the Lord, will forgive whom I will forgive, but of you it is required to forgive all men ~Doctrine & Covenants 64:8-10

"39 And again, verily I say unto you, if after thine enemy has come upon thee the first time, he repent and come unto thee praying thy forgiveness, thou shalt forgive him, and shalt hold it no more as a testimony against thine enemy—

40 And so on unto the second and third time; and as oft as thine enemy repenteth of the trespass wherewith he has trespassed against thee, thou shalt forgive him, until seventy times seven." ~ Doctrine & Covenants 98:39-40