Celestial Marriage: The Importance of Being Equally Yoked

"Marriage between man and woman is essential to His eternal plan.... Happiness in family life is most likely to be achieved when founded upon the teachings of the Lord Jesus Christ." The Family: A Proclamation to the World

Heavenly Father has given us several examples and manuals on how to stay on the path that leads us and our families back to Him. Along this path are infinite joys and heartbreaking sorrows but if we continue on the path an have faith in His plan then we will always come out victorious.
One thing that makes the path easier to endure is having a spouse with whom you are 'equally yoked'. Meaning that you share the same values and priorities in life about family, faith and the direction you both want to go. With both parents being of the same faith studies show that not only is the marital relationship stronger but the children also grow up having strong moral standards, less confusion about their place in the world and know that God is a loving God. The involvement of a shared faith and practice of prayer is a unifying blessing (Successful Marriages and Families, 18-187).

In relation to to having a shared faith between spouses is the unifying view of the value of being a family. If you find that making and having a family is not the top priority in your potential eternal companion then you can be assured that you are not 'equally yoked' and that the opposing priorities will eventually cause conflict. One of the greatest dangers of life is thinking you are the exception to the rules that Heavenly Father has clearly set out.
"To do well those things which God ordained to be the common lot of all man-kind, is the truest greatness. To be a successful father or a successful mother is greater than to be a successful general or a successful statesman. One is universal and eternal greatness, the other is ephemeral." ~ President Joseph Fielding 

Fidelity and the Sanctity of Life

We declare that God has commanded that the sacred powers of procreation are to be employed only between man and woman, lawfully wedded as husband and wife [and that] the means by which mortal life is created to be divinely appointed. We affirm the sanctity of life and of its importance in God's eternal plan.

Fidelity means being completely faithful to a person, cause or belief. It is shown by someone who acts with continuing loyalty and support. Over time the definition of this word may have stayed the same but it has also been diminished by the standards of the world and has become largely misunderstood. Many now believe that as long as there are no physical sexual acts with another who is not your spouse then there has been no infidelity. Honoring your spouse with complete fidelity is more than just not cheating on them physically.

Pornography is one of the most common forms of infidelity and it has disastrous affects on the reader or watcher. Continuing with this act of infidelity is a poison that seeps into the mind and drives the Holy Spirit away completely. Viewing pornographic material taints the mind and soul and leads them to think as people (or their spouse in particular) as an object to give pleasure instead of a human being, a precious child of God, your eternal companion who you are supposed to love and cherish beyond anything save God alone.

Once the mind has decided that people are objects and it is your right to have whatever pleasure your body desires it isn't very far of a leap to thinking that life itself can be done with as you please. The act of making love turns into a recreational activity rather than a sacred one between a husband and wife. Then an accident happens and a baby comes into the picture. Since life is no longer seen as precious, unless it be your own, abortion becomes your birth-control so that you can continue with your life of pleasure and zero commitment.

Heavenly Father sent us all down here to be born into family units who are to love and cherish each other. Infidelity of any kind goes against His entire eternal plan for His children and He has said that abortion is an abomination. He is not sending His spirit children down to earth to have their lights snuffed out before they can ever take their first breath or step in the world. (Successful Marriages and Families, 6-61; 27-290)

Keep Your Eye on the Temple

                                        

"The divine plan of happiness enables family relationships to be perpetuated beyond the grave. Sacred ordinances and covenants available in holy temples make it possible for individuals to return to the presence of God and for families to be united eternally." ~ The Family: A Proclamation to the World

Temples are the Houses of the Lord where blessings and everlasting covenants are made for both the living and those who have passed on. These covenants, enacted by the Father's holy priesthood power, commit the individual to higher promises to the Lord. When kept, these higher promises yield even higher blessings. These covenants when made with your spouse bind you both together for time and all eternity.

It is in these holy temples where worthy church members of sufficient age can come and participate in work for the dead. Heavenly Father does not believe in giving up on His children and will give as opportunities as necessary for them to accept the gospel and return to His side. So those of His children who pass away without the knowledge of the gospel or opportunity to be receive covenants such as baptism, endowment or family sealing in mortality are able to receive them through proxy.

The blessings of the temple strengthen and bind our families together in this life and after death. With the power of the Father's holy priesthood family relationships are perpetuated beyond the grave in both directions of time. As families continue to receive temple covenants and then attend the temple to do work for their dead relatives, both their future posterity and past generations are bound together in eternity.  Your parents will always be your parents, siblings will still be siblings and your spouse your eternal companion. This blessing includes those children who were never able to take their first breath and those children who grew up and strayed away from the light of the gospel. However, we are promised that none of our children are ever truly lost to us. "Those born under the covenant, throughout all eternity, are the children of their parents. Nothing except the unpardonable sin, or sin unto death, can break this tie" (Successful Marriages and Families, 16-173)

Choose to Forgive

"Successful marriages and families are established and maintained on principles of... repentance and forgiveness." The Family: A Proclamation to the World

The video above is a talk given by Elder David A. Bednar of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles called "And Nothing Shall Offend Them." Granted this talk deals with any person in the world who offends you, not just close acquaintances or family members but it still applies very well to what I wished to address in my post today. Many people find this topic to be so very complicated but if you follow the simple words given by Jesus Christ you'll find it is so very simple. The topic today is on forgiveness, especially on forgiveness between family members.

When someone is offended they often hold a grudge and become filled with hate and anger toward the other party. This hatred if acted upon can hurt the offender but it mostly hurts the person who is filled with the poison of hatred and prevents them from accessing the powers of forgiving. It can destroy relationships, especially if the offense has happened within the family, and turns the once faithful, devoted disciple away and far from the gospel path. The funny and bitter thing about offense is that most often the person who did the offending doesn't even know they hurt someone. 

So instead of wasting so much time dwelling on an offense that wasn't intended and by a family member who you love, and are presently or wish to be bound with for all eternity, choose to not be offended. If you can't choose that path then choose to forgive and forgive wholeheartedly. To those who find the saying 'forgive and forget' completely wrong or idiotic I wish to remind them of when we seek forgiveness with our Savior. Does He not promise to wash away our sins and erase them from His memory when we truly repent? So too are we to do with those who hurt or offend us. We acknowledge the hurt, take the time needed to truly forgive and allow the process of repentance to sink in and be sure to forgive without condoning the offense at the same time (Successful Marriages and Families, 20-203).

8 My disciples, in days of old, sought occasion against one another and forgave not one another in their hearts; and for this evil they were afflicted and sorely chastened.
9 Wherefore, I say unto you, that ye ought to forgive one another; for he that forgiveth not his brother his trespasses standeth condemned before the Lord; for there remaineth in him the greater sin. 
10 I, the Lord, will forgive whom I will forgive, but of you it is required to forgive all men ~Doctrine & Covenants 64:8-10

"39 And again, verily I say unto you, if after thine enemy has come upon thee the first time, he repent and come unto thee praying thy forgiveness, thou shalt forgive him, and shalt hold it no more as a testimony against thine enemy—

40 And so on unto the second and third time; and as oft as thine enemy repenteth of the trespass wherewith he has trespassed against thee, thou shalt forgive him, until seventy times seven." ~ Doctrine & Covenants 98:39-40

The Role of a Father

"By divine design, fathers are to preside over their families in love and righteousness and are responsible to provide the necessities of life and protection for their families." ~ The Family: A Proclamation to the World

President Ezra Taft Benson, in a conference, said this about fathering, "God established that fathers are to preside in the home. Fathers are to provide love, teach and direct." The father is a temporal provider, a teacher and the head in his family. He teaches and leads by example, protects and guides his children and presides over the family in love and righteousness. It is not a dictatorship where the rest of the family follows blindly. The father must listen to the spirit in leading his family as Christ would. He is to be aware of any and all relationships, whether they be ones that can contribute to the upbringing of his family or those that would be harmful. Most especially, the father must have an equal partnership with his wife in raising the children and maintain a strong relationship with her whether they are married or not. (Successful Marriages and Families, 13-143)

"Fatherhood is the greatest thing I could attain. If I were president of the United States, if I were CEO of a major corporation--that would end. The time wold come that I would be voted out of office or I would resign and retire. Yet I will always be the father of my children." (Successful Marriages and Families, 18-188)

The Divine Calling of Motherhood

Mothers are primarily responsible for the nurture of their children.

"Although scientific evidence has continued to demonstrate the importance of a mother's care, motherhood has been questioned and devalued in the broader culture" (Successful Marriages and Families, 12-129). By getting married and starting a family both the husband and wife know that there will be things they will have to put off or sacrifice while raising and caring for their children. It is this voluntary self-sacrifice for the well-being of their children that exemplifies the love and sacrifice the Lord feels for all of us. It is Heavenly Father's plan to send His children down here to grow and learn in a safe, loving and nurturing environment. Who better to do that than under the protection of a father and the compassion and resilience of a mother?

The role of motherhood is so sacred that Satan wishes to create confusion, doubt and contention around it. To the world being "just a mom" isn't seen as a worthy life goal or accomplishment but someone who wasn't able to live their own life and work toward their dreams. Living in a home where the family can rely on one flow of income is a luxury many do not have. Being a stay at home mom or a working mom, it makes no difference. Motherhood means sacrificing a bit of time for your loved ones early on and in the end the blessings and accomplishments made by those children far out weigh the sacrifices.

"Satan...well knows women are the compassionate, self-sacrificing, loving power that binds together the human family. He has convinced many of the lie that they are third-class citizens in the kingdom of God" (Elder Richard G Scott). "Motherhood is near to divinity. It is the highest, holiest service to be assumed by mankind. It places her who honors its holy calling and service next to the angels" (James R. Clark) [Successful Marriages and Families, 12-130]

An Equal Partnership

"Fathers and mothers are obligated to help one another as equal partners". ~ The Family: A Proclamation to the World

To the world, the sate of being equal means being the same; having the same privileges and access to opportunities in relation to freedom, education, career and other rights. However, equality does not mean sameness. I liken the meaning of equality to the balance of power between the United States' three branches. They each have their own separate role and duty in the protection and guiding of the country but they also must work together in order for the best decision to be made for the people. Husbands and wives, fathers and mothers, both have their own divine role to play in Heavenly Father's eternal plan. The husband is not domineering over his family nor is the wife submissive, they are interdependent with each other. Spouses are supposed to be 'equally yoked' together so that they are supporting each other, not one taking all the burden and responsibility. "There is not a president and vice president in the family." ~ Elder L. Tom Perry (Successful Marriages and Families, 4-41)

"Elder M. Russell Ballard of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles has taught: Men and women, though spiritually equal, are entrusted with different but equally significant roles. … Men are given stewardship over the sacred ordinances of the priesthood. To women, God gives stewardship over bestowing and nurturing mortal life, including providing physical bodies for God’s spirit children and guiding those children toward a knowledge of gospel truths. These stewardships, equally sacred and important, do not involve any false ideas about domination or subordination."